Posted by
Teri O'Brien on Wednesday, April 29, 2009 9:22:46 AM
What a magnificent celebration of Barack’s first one hundred days in office! First, Air Force One buzzes New York City on a Monday morning. Can you think of any more perfect way for the September 10 president and party to celebrate their messiah’s presidency? Having seen the footage of screaming citizens running for their lives and hearing the 911 calls, they’re all “it was a mistake,” and the man-god even said he found out when he saw it on tv, just like we did. There’s even talk that the “low-level” guy who approved the flyover might be fired, which seems a tad harsh. After all, he was just trying to do something cool, and if BHO is anything, as we all know, it’s cool.
Let me play along with the official story; that is, that B. Hussein didn’t know the location of one of his AF One planes at any given time. I picture that when they told self-absorbed, non-achieving former community organizer that some people, looking up and seeing a 747 flying low among the skyscrapers, were a bit concerned, he looked puzzled, until an aide said “you know, that thing Jeremiah was talking about? America’s chicken’s coming home to roost?” after which he thwacked his forehead, V-8 style, smiled the smile that has caused millions of liberal swoons, and exclaimed “Of course! I forgot all about that thing!” a fact that his recent decisions on revealing our interrogation methods to our enemies makes frighteningly obvious.
Meanwhile, yesterday to the delight of MS-NBC Obama bootlickers, and other tools of the democrat propaganda machine, Arlen Specter switched parties and made official what everyone has known for years: he’s a democrat. There hasn’t been such a stunning coming out since Clay Aiken shocked the world with the revelation that he is--wait for it--a homosexual. President Obama called Arlen to congratulate him on his decision. I wonder if that if addition to their new affinity as democrats, they talked about their other common experience: their friendship with murderous 60’s radicals. Gee, I wonder why no one in the crusading truth seeking press has mentioned Ira Einhorn, the co-founder of Earth Day, now in prison for murder. Arlen was his lawyer. I wonder if Ira Einhorn called Specter to congratulate him?
This non-news news was not enough to derail me from preparing for my own big Barack’s 100 Days in Office Celebration. The tree, resplendent with the ornaments I have lovingly collected over the last few years, looks great. There’s the little miniature TelePrompTer with real flashing lights. There’s the tiny Lego talking Jeremiah Wright, that recites some of the Rev’s well-known inspirational phrases like “Goddamn America!” There’s the adorable Michelle mini-Barbie, with the cardigan charmingly misbuttoned, with the teensy-weensy briefcase containing a copy of her racist college thesis and a pay stub reflecting that nice $200,000 raise that she got after her old man got her employer $1 million in government largess. There’s the Bowling Barack, with movable arms and legs, and the little shirt reading “Bowling:It’s Not Just for Retards Anymore.” Of course, there’s the hundreds of twinkling little acorns, 85% of them named after dead people and pets, just like those voters Barack’s pals at ACORN tried to register to vote as part of their commendable community outreach.
Seriously, 100 days? It feels more like 100 years to me. I haven’t seen time crawl like this since the last 10 minutes of my geology colloquium sophomore year. You had to be there, but I think you get the idea.